You can’t imagine it, Jessie J says. There she was gearing up for her new album launch in eight years, deeply enamored with her recent boyfriend, and at long last the mom to a little one after facing fertility challenges for ten years, feeling invincible. Then in spring she was found to have cancer in her breast.
The singer-songwriter, real name Jess Cornish, is known for speaking her mind. The record, the provocatively titled album, was supposed to be an candid account, addressing every bit of hardship she’d endured since she last made an album (endometriosis, losing a baby, broken romances, gaslighting, suicide) with typical candour. The first single, No Secrets, was released in the spring. But by then there remained a major undisclosed truth. The illness. Later second single, the upbeat Living My Best Life, debuted in late spring and the artist was giving interviews about how she was thriving, while still secretly dealing with her cancer. A month later she went public, and in the start of summer she had a mastectomy.
She gives me her best “Seriously?” look. “I release with a song called No Secrets. I’m doing every media appearance, and they ask, ‘What’s happening?’ and I’m, like, ‘Erm, yeah, nothing …’” the singer has just had to call off performances because she’s yet to undergo follow-up surgery.
We meet at a photography studio in the capital. She is dressed in a light brown synthetic jacket, jeans with ornate white designs, cream boots and big frames. Picture rocker vibe meets 70s singer aesthetic. “As if I’m in the 70s and I should have a boyfriend with a big tache.” Like the film, I say, thinking of the picture. “I was nicknamed that in school!” She beams. Cornish is quick, irreverent and blunt. She says she has always wanted to try comedy and is hoping to make her initial standup show in the coming year. “I enjoy humor. When performing I frequently joke about the fans.”
Health Struggles and Diagnosis
The artist was getting ready for an performance at the ceremony when she discovered a mass. “I quickly sought to get it examined, had an test, and they told me, ‘It seems benign; your breasts are normal.’ And I responded, ‘But I can feel it. My arm hurts and pins and needles in my hands whenever I wake up.’ And they suggested, ‘Well, let’s just do a biopsy?’ The date was March 28, the day after my birthday.” It was a Friday. The specialist told her if it was serious she’d call on the Monday. By then she had persuaded herself it was okay. The way she tells it, it was inopportune to receive a diagnosis when she had so much on.
“We’re two weeks away from releasing the album after years away and four years without a single. And she [the doctor] texted and said, ‘Are you free at six?’ And I thought, ‘It’s virtual, probably routine.’ So I jump on the Zoom believing it’s all going to be good, and she says, ‘Please take a seat.’ You know that sad tone they use? And she says, ‘I regret to inform you but your reports have indicated malignant cells.’” How did you respond? “I answered, ‘Well, that’s not great. The timing is terrible.’ My initial thought was, ‘I can’t die because my son needs me.’”
Men have called me difficult because I’m a strong person who understands who I am
She found the surgery terrifying and absurd. “I hate being put under. They walk you down. In urgent cases you go on a gurney, but now I just strolled down with a medical attire and my backside out. It felt surreal.” But, Cornish says, she’s been blessed. No chemotherapy or radiation, just the op. “It’s terrible, but yet Thank fuck I found it early. I underwent removal four months ago and my one side now resembles a grapefruit under a tight bedsheet.” She smiles again. “I got to keep the nipple, though.”
The follow-up procedure is for health and appearance. Her chest, she remarks, are now “asymmetrical. The size doesn’t match. How rude! I felt, no need to bully me, I’m already having a difficult experience. How offensive! Amusingly I said I’d not undergo augmentation because I’ve got OCD, and I know they’d never be flawless. My plans were disrupted.”
A History of Health Challenges
Cornish is familiar with health problems. She feels her outlook on her diagnosis has been so upbeat because she’s experienced in physical challenges. Many times they occur alongside career highs, acting as a reminder, or punch in the stomach, to make her recall not to take anything for granted. “Honestly, I feel life goes, ‘Things going well? Hold on.’ Since childhood, it has always gone alongside moments of success for me; something severe or obscure has impacted my body.”
She takes me back to her youth, already making her debut featuring in the West End in a musical (she was chosen at the age of nine years old). That’s when she was found to have the cardiac issue WPW, which can cause a fast heartbeat as well as dizziness and palpitations. “I was going in and out of rehearsals on an drip, and being readmitted at night.” She jumps ahead half a dozen years, and young Jessica has joined the girl group the group while enrolled in the performing arts school. “I secured a deal, and I had a brain incident. Then when I was about to put out music in recently I had a automobile accident and my throat was injured and I couldn’t sing for a long period.”
Hey, I say, wait, I can’t keep up. At just 17? She nods|agrees
